Divorce advice

Why women Leave

Why women leave men

I don’t know if you know, but 2 out of every 3 divorces are initiated by women.

Women are leaving men in droves?

Why are women leaving men?

Everybody knows that there is a very high rate of divorce but it is very surprising to realize that a lot of women are initiating the divorce process.

Why? Why are women leaving men? Why are women leaving their marriages, long standing relationships and commitments?

Listen to the great radio interview on “Why Women Leave Men”

[podcast]https://s3-eu-west-1.amazonaws.com/hsaudios/colourful/whywomenleave.mp3[/podcast]

One lady told me she was just fed up. She tried and tried and tried through the years to make it work but she now realize that it will never work. She feels that it is best to cut her losses and begin afresh.

Let’s look at some of the reasons why women are putting an end to the relationships they have been trying unsuccessfully to maintain for years. This is sometimes called the walk-away-bride syndrome.

  1. Women are no longer dependent on men for survival. Women can now command their own income and living allowance. In fact they are the main bread winners in many relationships. Their salary is more than that of the man. So they do not feel that they have to tolerate nonsense and put up with inadequate performance.
  2. Loss of attraction. Sometime women just lose interest in a man because of in explicable loss of attraction. This usually happens in new relationships. It may because the man.
  1. They are not getting any benefit from the relationship. Some women complain that they are the ones who are literally carrying the relationship. They give of their time, energy and emotions to nurture and make their partners happy and he give little or nothing back in return. “What’s the point?” Teresa asked rhetorically. Mary told me she does everything – both his and hers work. She works, cook, wash, do DIY and care for the children. He simply goes to work, comes home, eats, watches TV and sleep (and regularly wants sex). She finally came to the conclusion that he was just an added burden. She divorced him.
  2. Some women are not getting any romantic fulfillment. In some relationship some men do try, but they are not scratching where it itches. What they do does not fulfill the emotional needs of the women they are with. Women feel emotionally neglected, exhausted and starved.  After years of trying to get him to understand these women conclude that it is pointless and throw in the romantic flag.
  3. Lack of understanding from their husbands. Some women not only think that they do everything to build the marriage they talk to everyone and anyone who would listen about their frustration in their marriage. They feel their husband always ignore their plea for attention and romance. Their husbands on the other hand feel that women can never be satisfied. No matter how hard they – the husband – work to support the house the wife always see something to nag or complain about. So they develop a deaf ear. They ignore their wives in order to keep their sanity. This of course leads to more frustration on the part of the women who eventually give up and or walk out of the relationship.
  4. More options and increase awareness. With increase exposure to the media some women who use to comfortably take abuse from men are now awakening to the realization that they have options. They can contact or access free services which can help them rebuild there self esteem and become more assertive. This new sense of power enables them to leave or abandon the abusive relationship.
  5. Counselors. Counselors are advising women to in highly conflicted relationship to do what will make them happy – leave the relationship.

However something interesting also happens when women finally decides to abandon their relationships. Men suddenly wake up to the reality of losing what is most important to them – their family.

They start seeking counseling, going to church/temples/synagog etc. They reach out for help and promise to do anything to mend the relationship.

Most women by now are so frustrated that they simply turn a blind eye and a deaf ear. They will not hear any of the begging and pleading of these men. It’s too little too late for them.

Let me say that this is very strategic position for women. What they don’t realize is that these men are very serious about doing anything and everything to change. The tables are literally turned and the women are in the commanding position. They could finally get what they want.

This is when they can negotiate any condition they want. They have the full attention of the man in their life.

Alas some of them don’t understand this and plow through with their resolve to end the relationship. What a loss. What a big loss.

Why?

These men have just learned a very painful lesson. They resolve not to repeat it with the next relationship. So the next woman in their relationship gets a “new and improved” man. A better boyfriend, husband and soul mate is available for the next woman. This woman has just created a better romantic man for the next person.

What are women looking for in men? They want a soul mate, someone they trust who is there for them when they have a problem, who takes their feelings into account when decisions are being made. Someone to whom they feel emotionally connected.
Willard Harley

Here is a quick video about loss of attraction in dating relationships.

[ebvideo src=”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bZ1sd6Svafc” sharing=”1″]

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